Friday, February 22, 2008

Synesthesia :: Self Portrait of the Day

Darn. Somewhere along the line I see that part of my last post didn’t make it to this blog. I typed it, (I know, because while doing so I became distinctly aware that I was rambling, not sticking to the point or title of the post in my most good-intentioned round-about way of getting there eventually) and somehow, I don’t know how, I goofed on the “Post” part. I guess. Because I had much more than is there. And it’s only now I realize it’s missing. Jeesh. Yes, I will follow a tangent far longer than anyone should. I will follow it loyally along it’s unbeaten, (or overbeaten, perhaps) path even as I am thinking ‘go back, go back, you’re wasting time; you’re boring people; you’re sounding scattered!’ Yep. Hi there.

I have synesthesia. I won’t get into details, but suffice it to say that perhaps it is this which distracts my train of thought while speaking, or reading, or doing just about anything. Millions of details bombard us every day. Sights, sounds, smells, textures. You can feel a texture, you can hear a song. But in addition to such things, I can see the shape of a smell, or describe a word by the color of it’s spoken sound vs. the color of its written image which also may not correspond to the ‘actual’ (in my synesthetic brain) color of its individual letters, (for I see letters with color.) Creative inspiration showers over me like intricate doilies crocheted by my synesthesia on a daily basis. There are not enough hours in the day to respond. And just as I go off on a tangent while speaking, or writing, I do so while creating.

This self portrait illustrates that- - the irritatingly excessive amount of creative ways to describe my experience in one given moment, including the colors for the letters "i, e, and c" (when they are not capitalized), my Blog name and the date in two-arm semaphore, thought bubbles, pointing in all directions, random doodlings, and me, in color and black and white. It's all there the way I feel it most days. I tune much of it out, though. I think most synesthete's do.

Oh, and speaking of showers: snow…. it’s snowing in NYC. I love snow. I always feel as though I am being blessed when I walk in snow. Something about the delicate touch of each flake as it lands, the silence, the strong sense of water in the air. It’s like a first bath. A renewal. A new beginning. A mini fresh start. Then how dirty it gets so quickly; the initial beauty doesn’t last very long, and sets about its task, serving as receptor for all the ugly and bad. And eventually all that washes away. How very nice.

Click the photo to see better.

5 comments:

slÖ said...

not boring @ all :-)

(consult your pineal gland)

greetings from antwerp,

frank

+xÕx+

sMacThoughts said...

Thanks, Frank :)

Anonymous said...

Very intersting. I did not even know that existed. You are doing great being able to get what you do done. Love your shop by the way on etsy!

sMacThoughts said...

Thanks, dm, yes most people don't know about the condition, and it is rare, so there ya go. Thanks for the Etsy compliment, too!

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